DEAR RACHEL FRIEND

1:24 PM

Try as you may, you simply cannot escape the Kon Mari method. All your favorite Youtubers are doing it, your friends, your boss, maybe even your Grandma. Marie Kondo is making everyone realize how much useless crap they are hoarding in their homes, and a minimalist movement seems to have taken everyone by storm.

Like many of you, I also tuned into Tidying Up, Marie Kondo's new Netflix series about organizing your life and letting go of things that no longer "spark joy." Which c'mon, I totally love that, and Marie is basically one of the most adorable people I've ever seen in my entire life, but today I wanted to focus on an overlooked contributor to that show, and that is, Rachel Friend. 

Rachel Friend was featured on Episode One of Tidying Up, and from the moment I laid eyes on her, I whispered, "oh my god, that's me." Rachel and her family were struggling to keep a functional home with two toddlers, stress, and a marriage that was beginning to turn into resentment. First hand, I know what spousal resentment feels like, but we will get into that in a minute.

Rachel was working part time, but her main focus was caring for her two littles in their four walls, which seemed to be caving in on her mentally. The dishes never got caught up, the laundry was a never ending cycle of chaos, and the stuff. The stuff was every -freaking- where. Tell me this isn't half of the mama's who read here. I have been Rachel Friend, and I guarantee most of you have to.


With (un)social media, it's so easy for moms both working and stay at home to hide behind the photos of what we want others to think our life is like. Very rarely, are we shown someone we can legitimately relate to, and I think that is such a dangerous thing. How many times have you sat alone, hiding in the bathroom feeling like a failure as a wife, a mother, yet all these other people around you were just thriving and you couldn't figure out their secret? The secret is, there is no secret, and everyone feels the way you do at some point in their week. So when I saw Rachel, stressed worried, a toddler yanking down her shirt asking to nurse, I wanted to hug her and tell her "I know." I know how you feel, how you felt because I have been there.

As mentioned briefly on here, one of our huge 2018 changes was a career change for my husband. While we knew the schedule would be hectic and he'd be working long days, I wasn't fully ready for the challenges that brought. I think know I'm a damn good mom, but even the best of us have our breaking point, and when those walls start caving in, it's easy to lash out at the one person who is closest to you. Luckily, I listened to my feelings, and we worked the frustrations out before they got to anything serious, but let me assure you how freaking normal this is and it's something no one seems to want to own up to.

The world needs more reality in our tv. It's seriously that simple. Rachel reminded me of what it was to feel like I'm at my breaking point like nothing I do is right. I can speak for volumes of young moms when I say we need more representation like her. When we don't feel so alone, we aren't so alone, and at the end of the day, us moms are just trying to do the very best we can.

Check out Rachel HERE on Instagram!

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